The day is unusually cloudy for New Mexico. Massive snow clouds are hanging in the air as soon as I come to the other side of the mountains. I am reminded that it is still winter here and I am excited about the prospect of visiting them. Three Mexican Gray Wolves have arrived at the Wildlife West Enhanced Zoo and I have not seen them yet.
I see the ravens first, the companion birds of the wolves. “Follow the ravens”, one of my Native American friends has told me, “and you will find the wolves.” Ravens feed on the dead carcasses left behind by the wolves, they depend on these large predators to provide them with a meal and in turn lead them to a possible kill.
Some of the snow on the ground has melted, but their generous enclosure still has snow in it. Wolf tracks in the snow are a wonderful sign to me. There are many more in the mud by the fence. As I approach slowly, I tell them who I am with inaudible words, sending them my love and excitement. Of course they know that I am close, their senses are much more developed than human senses, much more honed and sharper than those of a dog.
A shadow moves by quickly along the fence and disappears behind the junipers. The first one has come out to see who is there. Towards the back fence I discern two more figures, pacing along the fence line. Against the white snow their wonderful winter coat with its many shades of color ranging from grayish brown to blackish and reddish tones stands out. After a few minutes, the most curious one comes out to look at me from a distance. It is the male. He is looking straight in my direction, unafraid and completely present. He sits down and starts licking his paws with a grace and ease that catches me off guard. Soon the other two are leaving the cover of the trees and slowly come closer, looking at me. I keep sending them my good intentions, silently, like a prayer: “It is me. I have come to be around you, to learn from you and to honor your presence. I come in peace and with love and gratitude for your arrival.”
I love being around them. It makes me feel alive and well and present. I forget the impending snow and the cold air brushing against my cheeks. I forget my cold feet and the frozen fingers in my gloves. I just am. No thoughts are crossing my mind and no feelings are coming up except for that of immense peace. It radiates from my being. I am still inside. I am alert. I am alive. As alive as they are. Now the male that made contact with me before is getting closer to the front fence. He looks in my direction and then makes a little jump, looking back over his shoulder as if he is imploring me to come play with him. I laugh and he shakes his coat. What a beautiful creature.
All of a sudden, there is excitement going on behind the fence in front of me. Running and pacing and looking over their shoulders all three wolves appear. Have I missed anything? I hear voices as I strain to listen for a sound. People are approaching and they have a dog on a leash. It makes sense now why the wolves would behave differently.
The people with the dog look at the wolves for a minute or two. “It is interesting”, one of them says, “ I always thought that wolves would be so big and fearsome, but these guys are barely the size of a German Shepard dog.” He shrugs his shoulders and they move on. The dog is marking the wooden pillar in front of me before he turns around. He is leaving his mark for the wolves.
In real life, they would have chased him out of their territory. He would have never been able to get as close to them as he did. They once roamed from Phoenix all the way to Mexico City. Now we need to protect them and ensure the survival of their species by keeping them in enclosures, in captive breeding programs and in our hearts.
But they are still here on this earth, gracing us with their presence. As long as they are here, I will be ok. That much I know. I thank them, silently and walk away as slowly as I have come.
Mexican Gray Wolf: Photo: Elke Duerr, Fractals: Delf Lepidosiren
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